The Diary of an AAPtard

18 May 2014 | rant, politics

Wednesday, 16th April 2014

Tomorrow’s voting day. Have my shiny new voters card. Now just have to vote, to make a difference. Haven’t figured out whom to vote for. Almost all parties are saying the same thing - “Vote for Change”. I’ll vote for change. I’m sick and tired of… of what really? Umm…corruption. Yeah, I’m sick of corruption. That’s what I am sick of. The corrupt traffic cop who fined me 500 bucks for drunk driving and didn’t pay it to the govt. The neighbourhood street cleaner who took extra money to clean up just because I dumped a load of broken glass on the street outside - what am I supposed to do? Wait for the BBMP truck and go to work a little late? Too bloody inconvenient.

AAP seems to be the easy choice - after all, they’re fighting for ‘Change’. Our society needs change. Just a little worried about some of the racist bigots there. The ones who want to root out ‘Blackies’ and kali-peeli Madrasis - probably Northies all of them. That’s why we’re different in the South. We don’t have any racial prejudices against anybody - in spite of the fact that all North Indians show off and have khap panchayats in their villages that routinely go around killing women (No, I’m not racist. See Oxymoron before you get pissed off). Nope, we South Indians are not like that.

AAP it is.

Thursday, 17th April, 2014

07:30 AM at the polling booth. Some people trickling in. Looks like a lot of support for Modi. Hmm… the guy is an efficient administrator, or is he? Is Gujrat really all that vibrant or is it just a media gimmick? All the Gujjus I know are reasonably well off. Tempting, but no. Not sure if he had a lot to do with the Godhra riots. Not sure if the media is really unbiased or agenda-driven. Maybe he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. But no, he supports Yeddy, who’s also supposed to be corrupt - or is he? If he’s corrupt, he would’ve been behind bars, not romping around Shimoga running election rallies. But then he would win anyway. He’s a Lingayat and most people in North Karnataka vote on caste lines. Shame in this day and age. Still, voting for the BJP sounds tempting.

Nope, not going down that rabbit-hole. I’ll vote for Prof. Babu Mathew who seems to be a well-qualified person. Plus, his name sounds Mallu. Yup, we Mallus need to stick together.

Friday, 16th May, 2014

Results out. Just realised that AAP had less votes than registered members. Only about 50% of Bangalore voted but on voting day, everyone was ‘supporting’ AAP - on Facebook and Twitter, from Goa, where they had taken off for a 4-day vacation. Thanks Mother-Cluckers. Your fart in the hurricane was immensely helpful to the Nation.

It’s a Modi wave and he’s vigorously waving his middle finger to all us broom-wielding AAPtards. Om NaMo…

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